My initial response after reading this article was that I was really surprised not because of the fact that children are not the perfect little things the media makes them out to be but because people didn’t know this. One day I might want to have kids but I know right know isn’t the best time because I’m sure having kids is wonderful but I’m not prepared emotionally or financially. I am only 22 and I know this I can’t believe people who planned on having children didn’t understand that it’s a lot harder than the media makes it out to be.
I am sure the media plays a role in why people think raising children is so easy. Most TV shows and movies show a perfect family with a working dad, a stay at home mom and well behaved children. Maybe it would be easier to raise children if a parent could stay home but in the world we live in today that’s nearly impossible. A lot of children grow up in a single parent home, which adds to the emotional stress of the children and the parent and if they are lucky enough to have both parents they both have to work to support the family, which is also stressful on the children and the parents. The media leaves out all the hard parts of raising children just like the commercials we watched in class, apparently having children changes your life in the best ways possible. I know that having children is a huge responsibility and when I am financially secure, happily married and emotionally prepared I will consider it but I will go into it prepared for hard times and not expect hallmark children.
I agree that all parents should have assistance, especially single parents. Not only is it important for the parents to lessen some of the burden of daily life but it’s important for the children so they have something to do after school or someone to be with. My mom only wanted the best for my sister and I that’s why she left our dad and took on the burden of being a single parent. My sister and I gave her hell and I feel awful for it now but I didn’t know any better when I was younger. All I knew was that I was always stuck watching my sister after school until my mom got home and we couldn’t go out and do things that required money because we just didn’t have any extra money. I feel awful for being such a bratty kid now that I understand what my mom actually had to go through.
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I think its great that you can recognize that your mom did the right thing by leaving your dad, and I also think its great that you recognize how much she sacrified for your well-being. I hope you have communicated to her how much her sacrifice meant to you.
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I agree that there is a false ideal view on how wonderful it is to be a parent, but just as we read about marriages, people have to come in with realistic views. Parenthood can be very rewarding but there's also going to be hard times, as we know as children, like you said we may not behave how our parents would like us to but that's what comes with family; it's never perfect. And your mom sounds like a strong woman who took on the entire responsiblity of raising you and your sister.
ReplyDeleteI think it is awesome that you have set up some great priorities for your own future. Choosing to be happily married, financially secure and very realistic about probably not having Hallmark children. Applause to your mom, that was not an easy path for her to take. Good for you, that you can see your part in being a bratty kid back them. Most of us don't see that until we become parents ourselves.
ReplyDeleteI disagree with the thought that most people cannot live with one parent working and the other staying home. I mean, sure, if you're a teacher then yeah it would be hard, but if two people live with a budget quite like what you had when you were younger with no extra spending then more parents, mothers or fathers, could stay home.
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